Talk:The Brokers/@comment-4072803-20151121192153

Yay, plot advancement! I'm glad that we're finally getting into the actual fights with the Brokers, it's a nice change of pace considering the more lighthearted tone of the previous chapters.

Leo's actually a half-decent character so far, though his 'flashback' was a bit... underwhelming. Don't get me wrong, the written format allows for that sort of flashback and it works fine, but it risks undercutting the emotional core that most go for when they're trying to build up sympathy with a character. Actually showing the events or the snippets of them gives the reader a better idea of what they've gone through and makes them easier to relate to/sympathize with. Just a thought. I do like his use of magic and his slightly more strategy-oriented fighting style rather than simple brute force. Kinda reminds me of an old quote from my history teacher; "If you're up against an enemy much stronger than you, the only way to win is to not play by their rules."

The other (and smaller) updates that were largely beginning fights were nice. I'm interested in seeing what Alex can do and how long he'll last (I think he'll probably win, but I can't see him coming back unscathed from this in the slightest). The more comedic segment with the Brokers was nice too, it's always a fun thing to have that more human aspect to your villains (though I guess it does depend on the villains). The beginning of Hershell's fight was actually... kind of awe-inspiring. O_o I have a bit more respect for the guy now, and he feels a bit more badass, not gonna lie.

9/10