Arrange The Clues V

Relax
The sun was beginning to set; as the darkness was starting to envelop the land. Even so, the group was scurrying to their next destination, as quickly as possible. Nevertheless, it was clearly in their sights; about five seconds later, they'd reached their destination.

This place seemed nice, but massively eerie; the lodge looked like it hadn't been touched in a good long while. Momoko snarked, "Anyone wanna bet that this is haunted?"

Wendy's knees began to knock. "H-haunted? Like g-g-ghosts?" She clung to Jason's robes again, eyeing the lodge with great trepidation.

Iris began to chant, "If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood, who ya gonna call-"

Vivian elbowed her lightly. "Iris, there is a time and place for everything! But not now."

"I...I don't think I wanna go..." Wendy replied timidly. Apparently, ghosts were not her thing. Ironic, considering she was merely a reflection of the genuine Wendy when one really thought about it.

Jason placed a hand on her shoulder. "It is fine. I'll kill even the dead if they pose a threat."

Iris interrupted, "They'll die even if they're killed."

Ulalia responded, "Don't be ridiculous! Dead people can't be alive!"

Momoko added in, "A real man never dies, even when he's killed!"

Vivian finished, "Even if we kill you, you probably wouldn't die."

Iris clutched the head. "...What?"

"Can we just get on with it?" Yasaka snapped.

Vivian nodded, surprisingly demurely. "Yeah, yeah." Slowly, Vivian pushed the snow-clad door open, causing droplets of white to descend down as the group entered the dusty hostel. "...Well, it's certainly abandoned." She peered to the right, witnessing a perfectly laid out banquet that looked brand-new. "...Wierd."

Jason looked at the food with distrust in his eyes. "I'm not certain we should touch it."

Iris, however, was already devouring a chicken leg. "Wha?"

Vivian elbowed her once more. "It's probably poisoned, you fool. Spit it out-" Iris refused to; it was too delicious. Suddenly. Vivian grabbed Iris and performed a rather nasty version of the Heimlich Manuver, as she coughed up the chiken leg.

Jason looked around the lodge. It seemed relatively harmless, but he wasn't sure. "I would assume this is here to make ourselves comfortable. However..." He frowned, and walked over to the table, looking at the food.

"Wendy, Momoko, can you detect any traces of poison? Any lethal contamination to the food at all?"

Wendy walked over, and breathed in deep through her nose. "I can't. It...it all smells fine, actually. I'm....I'm a little hungry." Her stomach growled.

Vivian picked up a piece of calamari with her hands. "Hmm, I honestly don't see a problem with it then. A bit suspicious, sure, but hey, a meal's a meal. Dig in guys."

Ulalia, of all people, was actually put off from this. "I think I've heard of this..."

Momoko couldn't detect a single thing. "....Oh? What do you mean?"

Ulalia rebuttled, "Ah, it's nothin'. Don't worry yer pretty little head 'bout it."

Jason took a seat down at the head of the table, Wendy sitting as close to him as physically possible so that two chairs occupied the end of the table,and everyone else spreading out, Vivian and Iris on the left side while Ulalia and Momoko took the right side.

"If nothing bears toxins...." Jason said cautiously, taking a bite out of chicken. "...enjoy the meal."

Ulalia still remained rather cautious, "I'm still wary...but hey, what can you do. It's a meal, and my stomach is grumbling more than my grandpa." She took a bite of chicken. "...Little spicy, but it's still good..." Her eyes became sparkly for a moment. "I think I'mma seeing things..."

Wendy was already eating, relishing every bite since she was really hungry. It was surprising how fast the child could eat and still retain her table manners. Naturally, everyone around began eating, totally immune to the delusions Ulalia seemed to be experiencing...

...except Yasaka, who had yet to take a bite.

Iris noticed Yasaka. "Hey, I'm a squirrel and I eat at the table like a human. Just 'cuz yer a cat doesn't mean you should eat like a cat."

Yasaka turned her nose up at everything. "I'm not touching any of this. And I don't think anyone else should either."

Sadly, no one was listening, as even Jason, who had decided thinking was best done full, was eating as well.

Iris zoned out for a moment. "Whoa. Is it just me....or are the walls running away from me?"

In her own mind, she witnessed something truly bizarre. The wall suddenly grew legs out of nowhere and began to scamper off. "JIVE TURKEY YOU DON'T NEED ME NO MORE."

Ulalia's pupils dilated. "...Why is everyone naked? And why are Wendy's boobs the size of blimps!?" Wendy was babbling incoherently as she was spinning around, laughing dissonantly.

Vivian was punching the wall, yelling, "Shut the hell up Ronald Raegan, I will tear this wall down before you!" Momoko, meanwhile, was climbing up the walls.

"Spider-Momoko, Spider-Momoko, does whatever, a Spider-Momoko does~"

Jason's eyes diluted as he muttered, "Oh man...the chicken is talking to me..."

The chicken responded, "WHAT THE FUCK MAN. WHY DID YOU TEAR MY SKIN OFF. I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS."

Yasaka sat there, looking at all of them as if they had gone insane. Well, they had. "...So, THAT is what it's like to chew 5 gum...WAIT, WHAT AM I TALKING ABOUT!?" She hit her head with her tiny paws. "Ok, they've all lost their mind....there has to be something to help this..." She started flying around the dining room of the lodge, looking for an antidote. She found several strange things, "Canned Hyena Laughs" among them, and what appeared to be laundry in a cauldron, though this was in another room. Sadly, no antidote. She sunk to the ground, groaning.

"What am I supposed to..." Then she caught the scent. The scene of hot water. She flew towards the back door of the lodge, and was greeted with the sight of hot springs. "These....these might work. I mean...I've seen water make people sober in stories." Heading back to the dining room (which was now in shambles), Yasaka raised her voice.

"EVERYONE! We're having a sexy party out back! All you need to do is strip and follow me!" If Exceed could blush, she'd be beet red at even suggesting this, but she figured she'd stomach the embarrassment in the hopes of making everyone a little less high.

Momoko's eyes suddenly focused on Yasaka; as she crawled off the wall and rushed over to Yasaka. "Can she swing, from a web~? No she can't, because she's a Momoko~" Suddenly, she began to strip ever swiftly, removing her clothes down to her underwear in a few moments. One had to wonder how she could do that.