Talk:Invasion/@comment-4072803-20151027053036

Okay, chapter review time!

This one was a bit interesting, especially because of how it was paced both... slow and fast at the same time? I dunno, it was a nice mix of the plot jumping forward and yet slowing down, and was a decent breather from the more fast-paced or brutally slow chapters recently. It was fun to see Damon Joestar D-D. Draco going on a bit of a rampage, and the usual incompetence of ordinary guards is something to be expected. I enjoyed that little peek at Caribou as well, it's interesting to get small hints as to where he's coming from and what his actual goal is (though the part of the rubies kinda semi-undid that development, it made him seem more motivated by greed than anything else, I dunno, maybe it was just the language he was using or it could be a red herring of some kind). I'm glad the fights are getting started and I'm a bit interested in Leo as well, though I'll have to wait for later chapters to get a better idea about him as a character.

Two grammar tips, though. If you're communicating thought, it would probably work better to keep things in italics without any quotation marks, as that's how its generally done. It wasn't a distraction, really, just something I noticed on the way that didn't feel entirely necessary. Also, at the preview for the next chapter, there's a small spelling error, "TUNNED" instead of what I assume should be "TUNED". That could be on purpose, I dunno.

Final Score: 9.1/10